7. Sponsoring the family of a shaheed

The shaheed has fought for Islam and Muslims. He gave up his life for me and you. Therefore the families of the shaheeds need to be honored and served.

When Ja’far bin Abi Talib was killed in the battle of Mu’tah, the Messenger of Allah (saw) told his wives: “Prepare food for the family of Ja’far because they are preoccupied with their affair” and he visited Ja’far’s house. (Related by Abu Dawud and al-Tirmithi).

Imam Ahmad narrates that when the Messenger of Allah received the news of the martyrdom of Ja’far he visited his house and asked Ja’far’s wife to bring the children. When they came to him he hugged them and kissed them while his eyes were shedding tears. Asma – the wife of Ja’far – said: “I asked the Messenger of Allah (saw) if something has happened” He said: “Yes, Ja’far was killed today” Asma said: “When I heard that I started crying and screaming. Then the Messenger of Allah (saw) left and told his wives: “Don’t forget to prepare food for the family of Ja’far because their affair has overwhelmed them””

The children of the shaheed need to find in the men of the ummah the care of their father. The wife of the shaheed should be given the opportunity of remarrying if she has the desire to. This requires two cultural changes.

First: The Muslim society needs to change its negative view regarding the divorced and widowed woman. Unfortunately, today men avoid women who are divorcees or widows. This stigma attached to our divorced and widowed sisters needs to be overcome.

Second: The Muslim society today is very intolerant towards polygamy - which becomes a social necessity especially in times of war. So isn’t it unfair to deprive millions of Muslim sisters from the blessings of marriage? No woman in the time of the sahabah was left without a husband - a partner who would take care of her psychological, physical and financial needs. When Ja’far died Abu Bakr married his wife and took care of her children.